I shouldn't have done it and yet I did.
I thought it would be a good idea and it was but at the same time it wasn't.
And so here I am

No, maybe I'm just restless.
Yes, maybe that is it.

Hmmm, not quite misplaced.
More like I've been replaced and it hurts.

It sucks.
So now I'm drifting.
Here, but wanting to run back to there.
Which isn't a place I want to be but here hurts so maybe there would soon be
The norm.

I hate the word norm.
I hate moving.
I hate having to go through the displaced, misplaced, replaced feelings.

I shouldn't have done it and yet I did
I thought it would be a good idea and it was but now in retrospect maybe it wasn't
So here I am.

Counting my blessings
Counting the fact that I can experience these emotions
Counting the opportunities that cause them.

Misplaced, displaced, and replaced.
That is okay.
Because on either side of the pond, the landing is soft.
Not in physical pain, not destitute, not left with only the clothes on my back
and so I'm okay

i will be okay.
This is good.
This is life.

This is the new norm (hate that word)
This is change, which preludes equilibrium.

And so I give thanks
To the one who moved Adam from Eden
To the one who told Abram to move to the unknown
To the one who misplaced Moses, to displace Israel to replace the Canaanites.

Not the best story to use to make the analogy
But i was moved for a purpose
For a season, for a reason.
In this I am confident.

This place is no longer my home.
It used to be.
The place I now live, will one day be home.

So rest assured.
Turn off the thinking cells.
Go to bed my child.

Because God IS...

I'm on the East coast, writing this at 2:13 am 
in an effort to convince my mind to sleep so that my
body can get much needed rest. Too many emotions flood
 my mind. But this is good. getting it out on paper, while it is 
still fresh. I am blessed beyond measure. Thank You Lord for it all.


Neers said...

wow!! am bloody stoked to see you still write! :) . remember me?? perfectly fine, if you dont - it was after all years ago - sorta blog friends

i come bearing early new year wishes