Responses to Dear God

so i boycotted my blog cuz i had finals and all this other stuff i needed to accomplish and then i came back to all these wonderful comments, most of which made mii cry (sniffle sniffle).
thanks y'all ( with my texas twang)
i really don't know how long this mental deliberation will take it just is a constant rollercoaster, i was in church yesterday and i oscillated between standing up and walking out cuz the pastor was talking about shaving his face when i was in need of a quardriple bypass but instead i sat there and just fumed and then cried and then started praying.
i don't know
it really seems like i should have mastered this whole disappointment thingy with God but yeah i haven't
what else
oh that class with the test, i aced it it makes absolutely no sense to mii but God is good the semester is over and my overall GPA basically remained the same.

@ disgodkidd: i prayed, u haven't contacted mii yet ooooooooo

@ Good Naija Girl: i wonder about the balance sometimes, having faith yet at the same time shielding your heart from the chance of disappointment. So yeah i agree with you that faith is important but how do we balance that with reality.

@ Adaeze: if deep down in your heart you don't b elieve in yourself, is that true faith? hmmm i wouldn't say i don't believe, i know He Can I just am not sure if He will so i am trying to prepare myself for the possibility that He says no. It's not a matter of faith, it's a matter of His will vs. your will and it just seems like for mii the two don't intersect so i'm trying to abandon my will and my dreams so that His Will won't leave mii shattered.

@ Remi: James chapter 1, and then Psalms 37 which i have this theological love for i constantly claim versus 23-25. I like what you wrote about vs. 5 tho' never thought about it that way praying for understanding and alignment of his timings .... i like that

to have no expectations means to have no hope hmmmmmmmmmmm
i guess you are right
it's just that it hurts too much to expect
and with each door that comes slamming shut in my face that i didn't expect a part of mii dies and not to sound melodramatic but i think ... i dunno i lost my train of thought

thank u soo much i love listening to u, actually i'm not listening more like reading, full of hope and with beautiful confidence and optimisim. it's hot in a spiritual kind of way :)

@ poeticallytinted: it was freud dang it i thought it was some greek philosopher like Socrates

@ StandTall: it's not easy, too true. each time u leave a comment or i visit your page i wonder about your hair and never ask, so yeah i'm asking is that really your hair and if so what is the story

@ Debbie: you sound like a combination of my fave. D. Lawrence and Marvin Sapp songs

@ Jaycee: hey darling LOL. i love the CC song, but then again i don't think there is a song they have that doesn't have a deep message.

@ The Life of a Stranger Called Me: i am taking your words and those of Remi and printing them out on little notecards and posting them on the door of my room and the steering wheel of my car. I am beyond serious.