Test results sniffle sniffle

Okay so i had a test about a week ago and let's just say i studied like crazy.

You know when you have a big test and you run a exhaustive comprehensive intensive seminar on everything and then you get to the test and all the questions are straight from your study notes?

Yeah well that didn't happen to mii
everything i studied was not on the test
my cheat sheet that you are allowed to bring was USELESS

the first question on the first page i drew a blank and then turned the page and my heart sank a lil' more
so i went to page 3 and when i realized that it wasn't going to get any better
i just started writing

so i get to class yesterday
get my test back
and i was blown away

i passed
not with a 74.5 like i expected
but a 90.5

i still don't know how that happened
when asked by my classmates
and then
one of them was like what you expect mii to believe this is a miracle
i was like
i don't know how i got every single question especially the hard ones right and then i missed the easiest one, i was majorly freaking out so yeah this is God.

Thank You Jesus

so help mii thank my GOd oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

now i have to get back to finding all of the malware and junk on my PC before the Conficker virus hits tomorrow

so yeah if you read this tonight
please run a scan on your PC to make sure you are clean oooooooooooooo


oh and thanks to all who mentioned my name in prayer,

WOW from a Relunctant Family Member: 1

WOW= Words of Wisdom
Relunctant= Loving family is easy, living & dealing with them ISN'T

Virtuoso, oh, ohoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

My unconsciousness loses the battle as my eyelids struggle to open and adjust to this Sabbath morning light.

Virtuoso, oh, ohooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

My brain tries to make sense of it all, did i sleep thru' my alarm?
Did i wake up only to throw my cellphone across the room in anger at the jaring sound?
I open my cellphone and the digital screen reads 7:29. Hmmmm, my alarm is set to go off in less than sixty seconds but how in the world is there music in THIS house, on a Sabbath morning BEFORE i have gotten up. WHY IS THE MUSIC SO LOUD?

I'm trying to control my annoyance at the blaring sounds as i struggle to get out of bed and make it to the bathroom, hoping and praying that it is empty and luckily for mii it is. As I emerge, i run into Shorty who proceeds to ask mii if He should take a shower first or if I wanted to, since i was already awake. I stand on my tippy toes, pat his head and nod.

End of story.

Seems like a normal scenerio, you wake up to music and get in the shower, right?
Normally, i wake up, take a shower and then wake up the cousins (aka shorty and kc, aka my kids). After I wake them up, I put on some Christian music like Big Daddy Weave, Chris Tomlin, Donnie McClurkin to get the Sabbath started and then go back to their room to make sure that they are out of bed. I then proceed to ask them who wants to get in the shower first and how many minutes they have. So imagine my suprise when I wake up to the king of sleep, Shorty, awake and already putting together a playlist. What is more suprising is that he looked at mii, ASKED mii if I wanted to take a shower first and then he is taken aback and looks at me wierd because I was stunned to silence.

Sometime between getting in the shower and looking for clothes to wear my annoyance gave way to beauty and praises as I released what had happen. Sometime in the last year, I had passed on the baton. My cousin was singing to David Phelps early on Sabbath morning and I had to smile, I had to close my eyes for just one second and say THANK YOU, LORD.

I'm always screaming at them on Sabbath morning to get up and take church seriously so that we can get there on time,
I'm habitually turning off their ghetto gangsta & angry white boy music and replacing it with my Christian music.

Yet I'm stunned when they take over and start listening (albeit at higher volumes than I would recommend) and singing to my jams.

I mean YES, it is the norm but normally i initiate it. It's my norm, I didn't expect them to adopt it. So I ask myself a question what else about mii are they adopting?

So yeah as you set out today what example are leaving behind
if those around you were to copy you what would it look it,
if they were to adopt your attitude and actions
would it make you smile

okay now its 8:47am and I need to be at church in 30 minutes so yeah, gotta split

have a blessed day

oh I don't know if i passed my Perf. Eval test will find out on monday


I have been writing when I am supposed to be studying and that is not good for a person who is trying to get a master's degree in computer science and not english lit but yeah, about 20 minutes ago i ended up on youtube cuz thefriend sent mii a link to some other video and then i clicked on this one and then i started to write instead of study. so yeah, it's fresh and raw and probably ladden with typos but yeah check it out
read and
then act,

oh and if you decide to say a prayer for this lady who has a Performance Evaluation Midterm in less than 12 hours that would also be nice

Throats dry, lips cracked,
I die each day a thousand times
you have it, you hate it
you replace it with soda and wine
and that's fine but I define my day
as a search for it
blood flows cuz i lack it
blood flows freely cuz we fight to protect the lil' we do have
one day, one drop, one life is lost
tick tock tick tock
old paths gives way to new
as we press on to pursue
this dream to attain that which
we pray will relieve our pain
dreams give way to reality and so
we replace our desire with buckets
of disease in order to appease our parched
throats and prolong our lives just so we can dream once more.

Woes of a Logical Person IX: Brainwork

my brain is a beautiful thing but sometimes it gets mii in trouble. my first woe of a logical person was over 2 years ago in February of 2007 and yet my brain persists in being a foe causing mii woe. in 2007 i think I had an understanding with Time, now time and I can't seem to be on the same page, some days we chill and others...

He says

Thank you for believing in mii

I think
I love you. I
love the you I know
and see, not the you, that
you want to become. I love you
but I'm scared that one day you will
look in the mirror and accept the you I
love and see now, and then you will reject mii
not because you do not love mii but because my
love will be irrelevant. You will not need mii and I will
not be enough for you. Just being mii loving the u i see now
without the reality of the u that u will become will not mean a
thing cuz you will be the man I love, not the hope driven version of
you. and so i wait. i wait as i love a man who is yet to accept my love for his
beautiful soul and not the man he wants so desperately to become. i wait to see
if my love will change him, i wonder if time will be the unmaking of this story, time
holds sway and dreams might demand i pay a price, so i sit and i ponder just a lil' while
longer and hope that this change that will help him accept my love will not undo our love.

Sex in the church

Okay this is a lil' racy so read at your own risk.

Confession: I've thought about sex in church. That's the truth, about 2 years ago, i was sitting in the pew, and i had this mini fantasy about sex, while i was sitting four pews from the front of the church. I'm not talking about thinking how sex is bad and how i'll never have it till i get married. Nooooo, i was sitting in church having a mini sexual fantasy. I'm not saying this to boast, it was definitely wrong, and that point in my life i was reading some pretty raunchy stuff so yeah fantasies at that time was the norm. I'm not trying to justify my behavior, but here's the point, if I, Miss Virgin-quoting-scripture-teaching-bible-study-first-to-get-to-church has to work at controlling sexual thoughts while SHE IS IN CHURCH (mercy), how hard it is for the rest of the nation (esp. those who watch Grey's Anatomy)?

Great Sex God's Way.

Are you kidding me?
I woke up this morning, turned on my computer to start studying and saw the headline of a Southern pastor causing a stir in Alabama for preaching about sex. For real, sex in the church, it seems just like yesterday that Ted Haggard was coming out of his meth and homosexual closest and all of a sudden the South has its panties in a bunch cuz a pastor is preaching about Great Sex God's Way.

I mean I have sex conversations with my 13 and 14 year old boyz, my 8 year old niece that watches Disney Channel tells me that my top isn't sexy and we are scared because the church is actually starting to address what is going on in the world.

I don't get it.

So yeah, is it cool for pastors to talk about Sex in church, is it cool for them to have billboards saying Great Sex God's Way? One pastor in Cali went so far as to tell married couples to have sex for seven straight days to save their marriage. This might seem extreme, but sex is everywhere, so how come we keep it out of church, do we really put on a different body when we walk into church, does our mind all of a sudden get sanitized?

I know what you are thinking, it is church we are supposed to be kosher, we can't be talking about great sex or any kind of sex. There is no sex in the Bible, there is fornication and adultery but they never use the S-E-X word. I mean when the pastor starts preaching about sex then i have to have a conversation with my child (who already knows about sex but isn't talking to you about it) about sex.

This could just be a publicity stunt to get people to come out to church,
this is watering down our values and trying to make church seem like a place where people can bring their dirty laundry and get comfortable.
This is sin.

I don't know

Here's the article

Here's the church's website

Here's a video from part of the church service

Have at it.

Now let mii actually start studying