The right dosage for my mind and random thoughts on PAIN

Sad, I miss blogging but school is kicking my behind so much, that putting my thoughts down in a coherent fashion requires a certain level of peace that requires two spoonfuls of patience to dwell a lil’ longer in reality which only proves disastrous unless I have a six pack of Hope and belief that dreams can become reality. I must pause at this point and state that this is only possible if I have the correct dosage of contentment cuz too much makes mii lazy thereby killing creativity and too little depletes my faith tank which is idling at Empty. But as I was saying without the correct amount of contentment happiness is impossible and my dreams become a lesson in torture. Basically what I am trying to say is that life is easy but living dreams is hard.

So what is on my mind
I’m working on this HIV piece, another is this huge mission/ministry project which is titled 5 not the 1, and Salty Fortress v 2.0 and the Death of Hope, oh and of course there is this woe of a logical person but it’s still to fresh and hurts to think about it much less write it out. In my head they are hot but as I said before I lack the contentment, faith, hope, patience and peace to drop them. But trust they are hot. God is good but yeah I’ll stop rambling and try and make some Sabbath sense for this beautiful weekend.

[Pain] removes the veil; it plants the flag of truth within the fortress of a rebel soul.
C.S. Lewis

Scars that bind
Tears that fasten mii to u
Our pain unites us
So be true to this emotion
live without shame your wounds
Carry your head high as the tears flow.
Let the tears fall and express your pain
without reservation, without regret
because the more we share our pain
the closer we become.
Pain shared is real, true, pure
I can’t fake pain, so why do I try to hide the most true part of who I am?
Why are we so ashamed of that which makes us most human?
Why do we hide our tears and fears and put on a mask that is not us?
Void of pretense pain exists to connect us, it exists to remind us, it exists to unite us.

So live your pain
Live it out loud
Let the tears fall
No shame.



Okay so I won 4 front row seat tickets to see Chris Tomlin and Israel and New Breed and then cuz i was on the front row going crazy in a room full of sane people Israel thru mii a t-shirt which had a coupon card for his new CD which drops in a month

4 FRONT ROW SEAT TICKETS 35 x 4 = $140.00
1 POWER OF ONE T-SHIRT 20 x 1 = $ 20.00
1 POWER OF ONE ALBUM 10 x 1 = $ 10.00

TOTAL = $170.00

So yeah I went to a concert, danced, cried, sang, lost my voice and did not pay the 170 that made the event possible.

so yeah i'm on cloud nine

i've uploaded a bunch of youtube videos and im including some in this post


i am soo happy right now

good night

oh there is this deep spiritual message that i got to share with y'all but my throat hurts and i have to be in church in about 8 hours cuz i'm performing with my now frog like voice before the sermon

so yeah
pray with mii
rejoice with mii
and listen to the lyrics of the music cuz both of these guys are DEEP

this last song is his latest single


Dear Human Part 2

Dear Human,

I love you. I love you not the you that you hope to become but you that is why I bled for you while you were still lying conniving, stealing and denying my very existence.

I heard it the first time you said it

No my child I don't think you understand.
I love you now, I love you still
The day you betrayed your spouse, snuck back into the house like a lil’ mouse clutching your blouse
The day you lied in order to get by and thought that you were so sly
The day you lied in order to be accepted by those who are so easily tempted
The day you lied and deserted the family I gave you to nourish and cherish
I loved you then, I love you still.

The day you broke that vow and treated your children like burdens
The day you subjected your brother to the derision of your friends in order to fit in
The day you killed love and threw away grace by the words that fell from your lips
The day you mistreated your body by sleeping around
The day you treated your body so cheaply by dressing it down
The day you treated your body that I created in My image so cheaply by snuffing, snorting, smoking, injecting, eating junk, drinking filth

The day you denied my existence…

Each day you persist to resist my existence you engage in an unholy tryst and assist the one who hates that you exist and would rather put you on hell’s eternal list than insist you listen to the Baptist and realize that you have been missed by the one who loves you.


Embrace it.
Embrace my love for you.
But I messed up.
I know, I loved you then,
I love you know, I love you still
Accept that I love you.
I’m serious I really do so please hold your head up high
Smile, live, breathe, share my love with those around u. share it n' live it
Take comfort in it

The life u led I forgave with the strips when I bled so that you wouldn’t live with pain and regret.
So deal with the consequences and let go of the shame and aim to reclaim your position to proclaim my Father’s name.

Shame comes from my enemy and grows into despair, that’s the product of your affair so you better beware ‘cuz he chooses to ensnare those who forget my love and dwell in the shame of their actions

He fastens himself with your secrets and fattens your despair with his lies and thereby frightens hope out of your lives. The longer you allow him to lie to you he lies in you and builds a home in your heart convincing you, deceiving you, blinding you to my love.

So free yourself
Free yourself from the degradation of your shame by confessing
Free yourself from the cycle of impurity, stop rationalizing
Free yourself from the sin that binds by surrendering
Free yourself from the shackles of despair by sharing
Free yourself from the prison of guilt by repenting
Free yourself
Free your mind
Free your soul
Cuz , I love you
Accept it, and each time the clouds of doubt come and they will because until I return for you the struggle continues
Return to me and remember that you were fearfully and wonderfully made in my image; in the image of my father you were created.

You do know that the hairs on your head are numbered not counted so each time you decided to dye hair strand number 45698 I know, each time you decide to trim the edges of the hair strands number 3244, 3245,3246 and 3247 I know, each eye lash is placed on your eyelid at a particular angle in order to shield your eyes from harmful objects. Each bone in your body is crafted for a purpose, each talent is given for a unique mission that only you can accomplish.
So I hope you get it.
I hope you understand that
Nothing can ever separate you from my love
Nothing can ever separate you from this love
Nothing living or dead
Nothing on the earth that I created with words from Our Lips
Nothing that man created with the power that I gave him, not even warships
Nothing in heaven which serves as the place where we will all coexist
Nothing that the devil might try to use to persist to enlist
Demons, nothing on their destructive checklist

Nothing legal or illegal
Nothing noble or ignoble
Nothing legible or illegible
Nothing mortal or immortal
Nothing flexible or inflexible
Nothing tangible or intangible
Nothing credible or incredible
Nothing possible or impossible
Nothing tractable or intractable
Nothing probable or improbable
Nothing material or immaterial
Nothing bendable or unbendable
Nothing thinkable or unthinkable
Nothing corruptible or incorruptible
Nothing describable or indescribable
Nothing containable or uncontainable
Nothing respectable or unrespectable
Nothing manageable or unmanageable
Nothing controllable or uncontrollable
Nothing surmountable or insurmountable

Lovingly Yours

Sabbath Series:16 - Just Thinking

My thoughts are scattered and I'm too excited right now (i'll tell u about y later) to compose them in a comprehensible manner so bear with this post

So how do you know.
How do you know if it is the will of God.

You wake up one morning and decide to become a doctor
how do you know that God is the one calling you to that field?
Is it by your natural talent for biochemistry,
your parents dreams and wants or your need to help people?
How do you know that God is calling you to that.
Or is there a voice in your head telling you to choose medicine over business

For real

I'm wondering and blogville is full of different people with different backgrounds so i figure y'all can lend a hand Kafo, a clueless quester.

How do you know he is the one
The one to spend your life with forever till death do us part
How do you know if want you want and what God wants for u are the same?
No, im not going to make this easier and tell you that he is a drug addict. Let's assume that there are two men equally sold out on Christ and responsible and all that jazz and you love both, how do you know which one God wants you to marry
Do you assume that God's will is what your heart wants u to do or ur mind?

While we are talking about marriage
let mii ask this
Do you believe that God chooses or we choose and God blesses or disapproves of our choice
The first belief basically means that God sends the person to complement you to you and that God knows who this person is and all you have to do is follow the voice is your head (HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS VOICE IS GOD'S AND NOT YOUR MOTHERS')

The second belief means that you make your choice and then God either blesses the union or.......
i'm not really sure how this belief pans out.

so yeah your calling as a minister, doctor, your choice of spouse how does the whole God told mii thingy work or do we just do want we want and add God's name to let him take the blame just in case it goes south

so yeah
have at it
cuz im confused