Avoidance 101

My phone rings at 12:43pm.
WEIRD cuz everyone knows I'll still in the process of waking up
I check the caller ID and smile.
I pick up

Hello
Hi, Princess
Hi, Beautiful
How are you?
I’m fine. How are you? Where are you?
Okay, I’m at Babcock
Hmmm I see.
You always pick up when I call. I knew you would pick up, I thought of who to call and said you will also pick up regardless of the time, you are such a different breed.
Of course, I’ll pick up
How are your sisters?
They are alive I think.
I dunno I don't care about them, shu

Kafo! (she laughs)
Okay okay
They are fine. Junior called mii last nite but my phone was off, she still doesn’t know what to do about the whole driver’s license Elhkart thing. I spoke to BBG the day before last, she is okay and I emailed Spiderella, she’s fine. They are all fine. So what’s going on? (I had to ask cuz she never calls in the middle of the day just to chat)
How old is Bola Female?
Ummmm I think between 28-30, I remember when she was 28 I think it was around your graduation or last year, I'm not sure. Maybe 32 worst case scenerio Why?
There is a person here is who asking about her.
I see
Do I know this person?

Is she coming for your sister’s wedding? AVOIDANCE #1(I learnt how to avoid answering questions from her, she is the queen)
I don’t think so
Why

I think she is going to Naija with her mom in may?
Ahhh, I see.
Why are you asking?
Why are they coming in May, they should just wait till August? AVOIDANCE #2
I dunno. I think they made their plans before my sister set her date.
I haven’t spoken to her since the Cali fiasco.
Are you trying to match make her with someone?

SILENCE
So how are you? AVOIDANCE #3
I am fine
Are you sure?
I'm broke
You are never broke (ahh not quite, I'm always broke I just never tell u)
True, cuz I'm good like that
Well you haven't worked in a while.
Hmmm, I'll c what I can do
Do I know this person?
Hello
SILENCE
Mommy
Yes daughter
Mercy. I didn’t know you did this, I knew your husband did, but you? I mean matchmaking is sooo not your expertise.
Anyway sha wonders shall never cease.

Mommy. na wa ooooo!
I am trying to reach BBG, AVOIDANCE #4
My dad must be rubbing off on you.
she is not picking up her phone. AVOIDANCE #5
True, her cell phone is dead. AGAIN! You can call her on the house phone tho. The number is 123-456-7890. Let mii try and connect you.

RING RING RING
She isn't picking up
I think she is in school tho.
I'll tell her to call you.
Bye family.
Bye Princess.
Bye.
***************************************************

My mom, my wonderful mind-her-business mom.
My quiet, beautiful, introvert mom called me JUST to find out my sister's-friend's age. Unbelievable.
For real.
My mom is soooo busy dealing with all the wayward kids in her university that to call in the middle of the work week just to chat is bizarre, this is something more along my dad's territory. I mean He calls just to hear my voice at the craziest times.
I mean the only time she calls me in the middle of the week, is if she had a dream or needs to reach one of my ever ELUSIVE sisters
(they NEVER pick up their phone when THEIR mother calls and then they call mii and try and get the uplink)


Here is the thing that got mii, she was able to NOT tell mii what i was trying to find out soooooo bad.
She is goooood!

I didn't even realize that I didn't get the person's name until after I dropped the phone
I'll call in reinforcements (the sisters) and we WILL succeed on Sunday.



Two thumbs up, mother
Two thumbs way up!


7 comments:

AnalĂ­a said...

mothers are something, aren't day?
Good luck on Sunday
Damn, now I want to know who that person was, too!!
Take care
I liked your post
Ani

Vixen said...

WHAT??? Mommy is trying to hook up Bola F? No way...did you call Bola? Who is supposed to be giving her the headsup?

How dare you call us the Elusive Sisters. Just cos we have a life and don't sit by the phone doest mean you are all that!!!

I love you anyway.

LondonBuki said...

Love this! LOL!!!

Your Mama is GOOD!

disgodkidd said...

kafo, hi, i saw your comments, thanks for stopping by. i have been out of town and offline for a while to sort out some things in my life. i should be blogging again real soon. meanwhile, i am looking forward to catching up on your read. i am really liking how you come across.

Poetic Justice said...

Okay first of all, I am not BBG anymore I am LadyB! Girl has to grow up from a baby to a lady now!

Secondly I am in school all day and well the truth of the matter is that I am always in school until 6:00

Thirdly I tried reaching your "elusive mother" she is avoiding my phone calls. Call me today. I will be home by 4:00pm

third! Love her! I think my wedding is not helping, driving her crazy!

ijeoma obu iheoma said...

lol...nawa oh!

Kafo said...

@ analia: all in good time

@ vixen: 20 cents says that when I call u on Sunday u have some lame excuse y u can't call YOUR mother. DON'T TELL BOLA Female OOOOOO

@ londonBuki: I read what u write about your mom. let's hope they don't meet.

@ PJ: u can't have 2 THIRDLYs one has to be fourth. about your name. WHAT
WHAT
u keep changing them that I can't really keep count. So I just went back to the beginning and used an oldie. HA