Thoughts behind the Words

Do you ever get the feeling that even tho' u say u r Christian u don't feel like it?
Like even tho' you are subconsciously aware of the fact that Jesus loves u, u have to struggle and make a conscious effort to live the Christian life.
So yeah, this is my dilemma,
I speak the words,
I think the thoughts,
but my life really doesn't reflect those ideals.
I keep on thinking that my light should just magically reflect Christ in mii but it doesn't.

I mean does the Christian Righteous Religious Right really need to be so loud and obnoxious about God and Prayer and Abortion and Gay Rights?
I mean does the Apologetics movement really need to get into logical arguments with agnostics and atheists?
I mean do Christian Archaeologists really need to dig up the Dead Sea Scrolls and remnants of Noah’s ark to prove the veracity of the Bible?
I mean do I really need to hand out pamphlets to friends in order to witness?

So I’m thinking it should never have to be screamed or heralded at the top of my lungs.
I mean Jesus came in a manger and yet we go to extraordinary lengths to make it a big fanfare.
I’m thinking that just maybe His light in my life would shine to the point that words will be useless.
I'm thinking that my life would be so uniquely beautiful and different that people would ask, mercy even BEG, instead of mii having to hit them over their heads with a Bible.
I'm thinking that I should never say the words, but the message would be ever heard just by the way I live my life.

But then again
I’m just thinking

SAID NEVER SEEN EVER

Noncompliant
I Live
Complacent
I Talk

But do I Walk?

My Light should
Whisper
From the Depths of my Soul
Resonate
Past This Outer Shell
Illuminate
With Words Unspoken
Distinguish
My Life from Yours
Circulate
The Gospel Truth
Simplify
The Fundamental Doctrines
Disintegrate
The Walls of Religion
Initiate
The Reconciliation Process

Recognition of the Maker is Instinctive
The Acknowledgement of His Power in a life should be ...
I dunno
Should it be blatantly screamed or annoyingly conveyed?
Or maybe it should be logically presented as a theory of science?
hmmm
...
Unspoken?

How about
Said Never but Seen Ever

I like that
Said Never Seen Ever

Copyright ©2007 Kafo


Is my life a reflection of His light?


It is almost 6 a.m. and I am still awake
Mercy. This is getting worse.

I ask myself this question as my eyelids threatening to lose the battle against gravity.
I ask not because I do not know the answer.

I ask
because I avoid it.

CNN takes on Naija

I know it is V day and I am supposed to be all about love but Jeff is majorly rubbing mi the wrong way.
So yeah if u are looking for a lovey dovey post switch blogs.
If it is your first time on this blog check out the Feb 3 post. I think it has today's temp.

This is not a political blog I just really really really really need to vent about Jeff.
I mean mii and him have been thru so much together. The last year and a half has been memorable and now this. AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Dear Jeff Koinange,

Women in the Sudan are carrying dead babies in their arms because they don’t how or where to drop them.

13 year old girls are getting raped in Congo refugee camps under the watchful eye of the United Nations.

Former child soldiers in Sierra Leone are being denied access to rehabilitation programs.

Somalia is unstable.
South Africa is still in a state of denial.
Guinea’s president just declared martial law.
Zimbabwe is breaking every record with inflation rates over 1,000 percent.

Yet here you are “rep”ing the continent and all you can bitch about is 24 Filipino hostages in the Niger Delta who are being held by MEND.
A ya
Just because you covered Nigerian politics since the death of Abacha does not make you an expert on internal strife in the region.
Just because you are African does not give you the right to get all Matt-Lauer and start declaring wars.
And before you start throwing phrases like emerging war in our faces let’s get the facts straight
There is no one who is anyone who has any level of brain matter and who is African who would believe for half a second that you did not pay those militia men for their performance.
They were smiling and dancing- Naijas don't do that for free
We are Nigerians for crying out loud we coined the phrase 419 so please spare us the journalistic integrity BS.
We know how it works; you don’t get to be number 1 on the Country Corruption list for giving free interviews to reporters. (yeah we got bumped down to # 3 last year but still)
And don’t for one minute delude yourself into thinking that you had anything to do with the release of those men.

Look let mii wrap this up before I start hurling curses.
Don’t let your head swell.
Cuz the moment it starts to swell your yash go dey follow am smell and your eyes
ooh your eyes
Yeah I took it there
Take that.

PS: Pass this on to your boss
CNN what makes mii so mad is that you think that if you put an African face on your story it would change the message.
He is a puppet who is getting paid a lot to talk on issues that you guys think is in the best interest of the United State government.
There is no freedom of speech.
Corporate gets to decide what News air.
I know that,
You know that,
So stop fronting (u guyz do know what fronting is RIGHT?)
cuz it’s all about the Benjamins

If this is your way of getting back at us because of the last OPEC vote you need to re-think your strategy.

Have a nice day
Realistically

Kafo


If this blog means absolutely nothing to you then check out the link below.
http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/africa/02/12/nigeria.reaction/index.html

Story behind the words

Okay so here's the story.
I don't do people,
I don't do guys,
Mercy! I don't do friends.
I have friends but it is always on my terms (Less messy that way)
So a couple of months ago when i started talking to this guy
It was on my terms (We talk 'cuz we gel)
I mean before i started this whole blogging thing
I would just talk to myself (Which most people consider a symptom of schizophrenia)
And being that i cherish my sanity i started talking to people, (namely him)
It began like any regular friendship the major difference was that we were honest with each other. If i wanted to get off the phone because my show was coming on then I told him. If i thought what he said was wack i'd let him know. No coyness or dancing around the issue

One thing led to another and we started these 4 hour marathons where we would start talking around 10 or 11 on Thursday nite and quit around 3 on Friday because his phone which is a landline would run out of juice (battery).
Now this is cool, I have friends who I talk to for hours but the difference was that we never ran out of things to say.

And then early this year I started looking forward to his calls. This is when I realized that there was a problem.
You c I don't do expectations.
The more you expect from a person the greater the probability that they will fail and you will end up hurt.
I mean the only reason why people are disappointed is because of unmet expectations. that's like psych 101
So I try not to expect anything. (except from family and they disappoint 8 times out of 10 thus proving my point, I mean numbers don't lie right?)

But then i started to expect his calls. ISSUE #1

and then there is the whole thing that i don't talk to this guy in public i mean we do but it is like lame stuff like the weather or a song and it never lasts more than a minute and then i just run out of things to say. I never run out of things to say on the phone but the up-close-and-personal thing wasn't working. I'd just get tongue-tied ISSUE #2

Then I'd bolt cuz i have run out of lame things to say
I never bolt thus bringing us to ISSUE #3

So because of the expectations
because of the tongue-tiedness (yeah i know it not a word but it sounded good in my head)
and because of the bolting

I had to sit down with my head and heart and have a discussion (I mean 3 issues can't be a coincidence)
which i always try to avoid cuz i luv my head but my heart just makes stuff messy
And my head couldn't convince my heart so i talked to the object of my affection (the whole honesty thing) and basically laid it out

I wanted this feeling out of my body
but my heart is not so easily persuaded
so I'm hoping that maybe if you act like a dick
My head could convince my heart and life could go back to normal


Yeah yeah yeah I know at this point y'all are thinking that I'm nuts, but I like the status quo. At least I have convinced myself that I like the status quo. So yeah

He refused to act like a dick
I said yo it would help if you just say you are not into mii
He says he can't do that either
I say why
He says cuz He is a nice person
I go into agrument mode and say that nice people sometimes have to think of the greater good and u don't want mii stalking you. So you need to be mean to be nice
He gets quiet
I launch into how five words are very easy to say
Still quiet
I say yo we r friends this is a favor
He says being that we have the whole honesty thing it would be a lie and he couldn't lie to mii
I say oooo
He is quiet
I say I need a lil more info aiight (Yeah yeah yeah y'all know where this is going but I needed to here the words so it won't be like my heart is playing tricks again)
He says he is into mii
i said that doesn't help matters
he says What
i say i'm trying to get away from this feeling not embrace it

he says i understand

then we have a logical discussion

and y'all know the rest
So we r taking a month off of talking
cuz we figured it was the talking that might have brought on the mess

Now a week after that discussion
It seems that logical people really are not as smart as we think we r

Yeah
That's the story

Woes of a Logical Person: I

I smile
He smiles

I speak
He speaks

I laugh
He laughs

I move
He moves

This dance
Between us

Logistics

We both know
And yet we wait

We both feel
Yet never touch

Fantasy persists
But reality prevents

Reality prevails
So dreams recede

Diminishing slowing
into the recesses of the soul

Logistics

Unworthy not by choice
But by chance

With nothing to offer
We linger and hope

The days pass us by
And yet we wait

Not for each other
But for life

For time to pass and
Make us worthy

...

Logistics
Copyright ©2007 Kafo

I couldn't sleep
I love sleep
So I opened up Word last Thursday nite (in actuality Friday morning) and typed and backspaced and typed some more. So this is the result, this is my reaction after I had a logical and realistic discussion (STRAIGHT TALK) with a smart and nice person.